It's a Jungle Out There

We have a yard guy. His name is Felix. Felix has taken care of the lawn (mowing, weed-eating, edging) for the past 3 summers-- ever since our lawn mower stopped working. We LOVE Felix. But we are cheap (ahem, too cheap to buy a new lawn mower). So Felix only comes every other week... which leads me to this post.

Our backyard is impressive for a starter subdivision like ours. It is really quite large, mostly due to the fact that our lot is sort of shaped like a slice of pie-- our front yard is the size of a postage stamp. Several years ago, in a phenomenon that Kevin and I cannot explain, our grass suddenly up and died. We thought perhaps it was chinch bugs, then thought it was a "take all" patch...? Well, regardless. Weed and feed ain't got nothin' on this grass killer. So we have a backyard full of very green weeds (thanks to the rain and summer sprinkler entertainment), plus a little stubborn St. Augustine.

A week after Felix comes to mow down the weeds, they are already pretty high. 2 weeks later, we no longer play in the backyard.

Last Friday, the boys NEEDED to go outside if you know what I mean. So I turned them out. Judah did not like this plan at all, since the grass was so high. He pitched a little fit--complete with tears. I sighed and thought to myself that my children needed a lesson in outdoor play. So, I crouched down to their level and said to my boys, "That's not grass. That is the jungle, and lions hide in the tall grasses. You have to keep your eyes open because this time of year, they are very hungry and love to eat little boys. It's a good thing we brought our bows and arrows." I hitched up my sweat pants and slunk through the tall grass looking over my shoulder for lions. I stepped on the garden hose. I yelped, "It's a snake! Shoot it boys, before it bites us!" They dissolved into giggles and aimed imaginary arrows at the hose. I flitted to the faucet and turned on the sprinkler. "Quick!" I yelled. "Through the waterfall! Those snakes hate water." In my clothes I hopped over the stream of water as the boys followed behind me. I dropped to a squat, and pointed around the corner at the imaginary elephants. Judah shot one. I told him we didn't shoot the elephants-- that would make us poachers. But elephants are dangerous around the watering hole, and if they think we are a threat to their babies, so we will need our weapons for self defense...

After about 15 minutes, I slipped back inside. I did the dishes, fed Annie and kept peeking outside with a self satisfied smile. An hour later, I called the boys in for lunch.

The next day, Felix came and mowed our grass. Judah saw the backyard and cried for his jungle. I told him not to worry. It will grow back.